The Top Questions to Ask Yourself Before Becoming Vegan

posted by Aaron Zytle - 

Since today is World Vegan Day, check out The Top Questions to Ask Yourself Before Becoming Vegan.

 Is my life really worth extending?

 Will my Facebook friends enjoy my constant posts about what I'm substituting for butter, milk, cheese, and ground beef?

 Can I stick to it even when the McRib comes back?

 Do I really want to do this right after the kids hauled in two massive bags of Halloween candy?

Will the rest of the sex club mock me when I arrive in a pleather gimp outfit?

 Is this the best way to lose friends and alienate family members?

 Can I trick my taste buds into thinking that tofu is just like meat?

 Am I required to listen to 10,000 Maniacs, or is it optional?

 Meals are WAY more enjoyable when everything tastes bland and flavorless, right?

 How many soybean farts can I blame on the dog?

 Can I give it up for Lent?  Granma's ham is da bomb!

 Will there be a rip in the space-time continuum if I go vegan, but also drive a gas-guzzling Chevy Suburban?

 Will becoming a vegan help me get the number of that hot chick in my wife's yoga class?

 Do I really want to have something in common with Moby?

 Can I handle grocery shopping alongside all those d-bags at Whole Foods?

 Why do I hate myself enough to give up bacon?

 If someone hugs me, am I ready to snap in half?

 Will I still be able to make "cheesy" jokes?

 Am I good at judging others?


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